It has been a rough afternoon. Verbal insults have been tossed around the car and you do not think your vocal cords can handle the amount of abuse you have put them through. You are sick and tired of your sibling adjusting the AC or changing the radio station while you are driving and you are worried that the last anybody will ever see of you is in the bottom of a ditch, dead with both of your hands around your sibling’s neck. By some miracle, you make it home and you both dash out of the car, making a beeline for the bathroom. You push and shove but your sibling comes out victorious, sliding into the bathroom and shutting the door in your face unceremoniously. You wait outside uncomfortably, relieved when you finally hear a flush. Seconds tick by and the door is still closed. The sound of a YouTube video begins to play and you realize what is happening. Your stomach fills with dread and you start to wonder why your mother couldn’t have just stopped at one kid.

Siblings are entities you can not get rid of. Some have had them since as long as they can remember and some have gone years without them. Some were born as a lone wolf in this world, destined to a life of always getting the passenger seat and never having to share their belongings with anyone else. The age-old question then arises. What is better? Having a sibling(s) or being an only child?

We really don’t choose to enter this world. From the moment you are born you become either a first (and possibly only) or you become any number after that. I think having a sibling comes with a plethora of benefits, but it also comes with its downsides. Some are lucky and can form a good bond easily with their siblings from an early age. Some are not as lucky and have a habit of butting heads with their siblings. Regardless, they’re a part of your life and you have to learn to live with them. I won’t lie and say that having siblings is easy, in fact I think it is the opposite. Loving them takes as much work as hating them, but I would choose loving or hating them any day. I think having siblings is worth it and worth the effort it takes to have a good relationship with them.

Growing up with two sisters is challenging. Out of the three, I’m the baby of the family. My oldest sister is about 13 years older than me and the second oldest is 15 months older than me. As a young kid, having a teenage sister came with its challenges. I got used to doors being slammed in my face, shouting when I found old pizza boxes and peanut butter under her bed and getting in trouble for ripping a poster of a shirtless Shane West or Justin Timberlake from her wall. An unfortunate game of baseball with her led to a bat in the face and a scar to go with it (it was an accident) and I grew accustomed to being a human pretzel because wrestling was the way she liked to show affection.

The second eldest (Lauren) is the one I’ve lived with the longest. She steals my stuff, likes to change the radio station when I’m driving, and takes way too long in the shower. She once knocked a loose tooth out of my mouth and nearly drowned me (both incidents were accidents). 

Despite our differences, I know I can always turn to them when I need them. They pick up my broken parts and help me figure out how to put them back together. They are the funniest people I know and never fail to cheer me up when I’m at my lowest. They give me hope that things will be okay in the future and that it is not as daunting as I think. I have a big responsibility as a sibling too. I try to be there for them as much as they are there for me. I hurt when they hurt and I cry when they cry. I try to be a sibling that they can count on, but I am not perfect. I let down my sisters sometimes, often because I’m wrapped up in my own problems. Despite my imperfections, I still try to remind myself that sacrificing some of my time will benefit not only my sister but myself as well.

My experiences won’t match others, but fundamentally I believe that if you are able to make a close connection with your siblings, you should. That feeling of comradery when I’m with my sisters is something I haven’t ever experienced with anyone, even my closest friends and I think everyone should feel that way if they have the opportunity to do so. They can become people you can lean and depend on if you give yourself the chance to form a connection.

Siblings are your ride or die and they should be someone you can always count on. Not every pair of siblings are close and not every pair even have a relationship. But from personal experience, forming a strong bond with the people you have shared a womb with is extremely important. I suppose that answers the question then. Is it better to be an only child or to have a sibling? In my personal opinion, having siblings is one of the best blessings a person can have.